The Top 14 Chapters in "NASCAR for Dummies"

 14. Chapter 1: How to Read
 13. Chapter 6: Dress for Success: Tube Tops and Skynyrd Tour Shirts
 12. Chapter 4: Advanced Technical Terms -- "Yeeeehaww!", "Whoooodoggie!", and "Golldurn!"
 11. Chapter 12: Why Drunk Chicks Flash the Drivers, and How to Nail Them
 10. Chapter 17: "I Watch for the Allegorical Portrayal of Post-Modern Tropism"
                      and Other Things to Tell Fancy-Pants Urbanites
  9. Chapter 5: Saying "Dick Trickle" Without Snickering
  8. Appendix A: 20 Quick Prayers for Those Upside-Down Moments
  7. Chapter 2: The Finer Points of Hating Jeff Gordon
  6. Chapter 13: Where to Find Them Little Fake "Calvin" Kids Peeing On Stuff
  5. Chapter 8: I’ll Tell You Whut!
  4. Chapter 9: Going the Distance: Peeing Into an Empty Big Gulp Cup at 200+ mph
  3. Chapter 15: Spit or Swallow? Learning to Chew Tobacco Through Sexual Metaphors
  2. Chapter 3: Hey, Isn't Dale a Girl's Name?

and the Number 1 Chapter in "NASCAR for Dummies"...

 Chapter 7: The Mullet: The Haircut of the Gods is a Practical AND Fashionable
                    Hairstyle for the Discerning Automotive Enthusiast